{"id":1110,"date":"2025-06-22T14:39:55","date_gmt":"2025-06-22T19:39:55","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/ashleybeanthornton.com\/?p=1110"},"modified":"2025-12-04T10:22:29","modified_gmt":"2025-12-04T16:22:29","slug":"whats-my-why-part-1-im-the-luckiest-girl-in-the-world","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/ashleybeanthornton.com\/es\/whats-my-why-part-1-im-the-luckiest-girl-in-the-world\/","title":{"rendered":"What\u2019s my \u201cWhy?\u201d Part 1: I\u2019m the luckiest girl in the world\u2026"},"content":{"rendered":"
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What\u2019s my \u201cWhy?\u201d Part 1: I\u2019m the luckiest girl in the world\u2026<\/h1>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t
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This post originally appeared on\u00a0Dead Dillo<\/a>.<\/em><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t

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I worked a good long while, I saved up some money, and now I am retired.<\/p>

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Just about every morning of my life I get up out of my soft bed in my air-conditioned house, I put on my red hi-tops and whatever other comfortable clothes I am going to wear for the day, I kiss my sweet husband, I pet my doggies, and I go to Whataburger.<\/p>

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I fill up my super-cool stainless steel Whatacup with mostly ice and some Diet Coke, I order a Jalapeno Cheddar Biscuit with sausage, I say \u201cHi\u201d to all my Whatafriends, and I head to my corner booth where there is a plug. I set up my snazzy laptop and I settle in to read a little, do a little social-media-ing, and maybe, if I am feeling ambitious, do a little writing before I get going on my, usually pleasant, day\u2019s activities. This is a long way of saying I am living the dream!<\/p>

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Not to be a downer, but sometimes while I am listening to the clink of the ice falling into my cup, I think about how strange it is that in the same world where I am living such a beautiful life there are people who don\u2019t have water much less a plentiful supply of ice. There are people huddling together in bomb shelters, people starving as they watch their children go hungry. Closer to home there are people wandering the streets fighting their own mental health demons while begging for money just to be able to keep body and soul together. There are women in despair because they don\u2019t know how to leave their abusive husbands \u2013 especially now that they are pregnant again. The list goes on and on of people who are living a nightmare while I am living the dream.<\/p>

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This bothers me. Maybe it bothers you too or maybe I am a weirdo. (\u201cWhy not both?\u201d you may be thinking\u2026) Why am I so lucky?<\/p>

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Maybe it\u2019s because they are lazier than I am? I like to work, and I am a hard worker, and I do think that helped me have a great life, but I know plenty of people who work\/worked much harder than I ever have who do not have nearly as great a life as I do.<\/p>

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Is it because I am a better person? I do think I am a good person, or at least I try to be. I do think being a good person helps, but some of the best people I know \u2013 far better than me when it comes to kindness and generosity\u2013 have much harder lives than I do. That\u2019s not even counting the people starving or the people huddling in bomb shelters. I imagine at least some of them are good people too.<\/p>

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Maybe it\u2019s because I am a Christian and they are not? I am a Christian. I\u2019m not as Christian-y as some, and Jesus may have some things to say to me when it\u2019s all over, but I feel like he is going to take me in when it comes right down to it. I know plenty of people who are more devout than I am who do not have as great of a life. When it comes right down to it, I know of people who are not Christian at all and don\u2019t claim to be who seem to be living really good lives. I don\u2019t think that\u2019s it.<\/p>

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Is it because I made better choices? I did make some great choices. I finished my education. I married a good person. I chose to save some money along the way when I could have spent it. I pretty much stayed on the straight and narrow and didn\u2019t do too many crimes. I do think those choices really helped. On the other hand, I was lucky to even have those choices to make. Also, I have, and have always had, enough \u201cbuffer\u201d in my life that even when I make a bad choice I can usually recover quickly.<\/p>

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I don\u2019t feel guilty about my wonderful life. I enjoy it. I am thankful for it every day. I don\u2019t feel bad that I am so lucky, but I do wonder why so many people are so unlucky, and I wonder if it has to be that way. Do they have to be unlucky for me to be lucky? I don\u2019t think so. In fact, I think we would all be better off if more of us were living the dream \u2013 or at least had a reasonable shot at it \u2013 and fewer of us were living the nightmare.<\/p>

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I think quite a lot about politics these days. Some of you know I even went as far as to apply to the\u00a0LBJ Women\u2019s Campaign School<\/a>\u00a0which I am in the middle of completing right now. During the first week of campaign school one of the main things we talked about is \u201cWhat is your \u2018Why?\u2019\u201d What has gotten you up off the couch and moving? What is going to keep you motivated when things get hard and you are tired? I heard lots of inspiring stories from other people about their various \u201cWhys.\u201d I thought all week about my \u201cWhy.\u201d<\/p>

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One of the problems with me being a politician is that I have a hard time explaining my \u201cwhy\u201d in a way that is moving and inspiring. I tend to take too many words to explain it, it doesn\u2019t fit very well on meme, or a sticker, or even one of those big, glossy postcards you get during campaign season, but I\u2019ll take a swing at explaining at least part of it here\u2026<\/p>

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I think we over-romanticize struggling \u2013 especially struggling for other people. I think struggling is kind of like fire: a little bit, under controlled conditions, is good and useful, but too much is dangerous and bad. I think a little bit of a struggle \u2013 working hard, figuring out things for yourself, walking through the unavoidable tragedies of life \u2013 is fine, even good. But, like fire, too much struggle is bad for people, it causes damage, sometimes irreparable harm.<\/p>

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When we see people facing terrible struggles we often believe and govern as if their struggles are their own fault and if we do \u201ctoo much\u201d to help ease those struggles we will make people lazy, or they will just take advantage of us. Would we do that if we were in that position and someone helped us?<\/p>

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Sure, people do stupid things and make awful decisions \u2014 and that causes some struggle. I think we over-estimate that though. I think that kind of \u201cwell-earned\u201d struggle accounts for a fairly small percentage of the struggles people face in the world.<\/p>

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I think people\u2019s struggles are very often just bad luck. I am lucky. I was born to good parents who loved me and who worked hard to have the means to take care of me \u2013 I did nothing to deserve that. I live in a prosperous country with stable laws, a good economy, and good public education. I was born healthy. I was born straight and White in a time and a place where that has provided me numerous advantages and helped me avoid numerous struggles. My childhood wasn\u2019t perfect I don\u2019t guess, but it was pretty darn stable and good. All that luck didn\u2019t make me lazy and dependent and weak \u2013 I think it helped make me strong, and smart, hard-working, healthy, and hopefully kind.<\/p>

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I think we are out of balance in the way we respond to struggling. I think we over- romanticize the good it might do (almost always for other people) and fail to acknowledge the harm that it causes. I think we admire ourselves for our good fortune, and blame others for their misfortune, instead of acknowledging the huge role that luck plays in both.<\/p>

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People are not all good little angels. I know that. I know when we work toward building a society that helps alleviate struggle and gives more people a real shot at living the dream, we have to be aware that some will cheat and take advantage.<\/p>

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We have to make rules and take reasonable precautions against that \u2013 just like we have to have some regulations on big business so that corporations do not cheat and take advantage.<\/p>

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Just like we sometimes do with over-regulation of business, though, I sometimes think that in our zeal to protect ourselves from cheating by the few, we miss out on the benefit we could gain by providing stable, accessible, well-managed support for the many who are struggling who wouldn\u2019t cheat. The cost of misplaced trust can be high, but the cost of lack of trust can be much higher \u2013 especially if we count the opportunity cost.<\/p>

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I think we are all better off if more of us are living the dream instead of struggling through a nightmare. I think we often overestimate people\u2019s responsibility for their own struggles and underestimate the role of luck in our own good fortune. I think we are paying too high a cost for lack of trust in each other. I know we need reasonable rules and regulations on our efforts to alleviate struggle and to give people a better shot at \u201cthe dream,\u201d but I think we are out of balance in that regard. I think we could do better, help more people, and we would be better off for it. I think politics and the government has a role in that.<\/p>

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That\u2019s part of my \u201cwhy\u201d \u2013 but far from all of it! Ha! If you have suggestions for how I can squeeze that into button, a bumper sticker, or an Instagram post, I would love to hear them!<\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

What\u2019s my \u201cWhy?\u201d Part 1: I\u2019m the luckiest girl in the world\u2026 This post originally appeared on\u00a0Dead Dillo. I worked a good long while, I saved up some money, and now I am retired. \u00a0 Just about every morning of my life I get up out of my soft bed in my air-conditioned house, I […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":17,"featured_media":2461,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","_seopress_robots_follow":"","_seopress_robots_imageindex":"","_seopress_robots_snippet":"","_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"none","_seopress_robots_breadcrumbs":"","_seopress_robots_freeze_modified_date":"","_seopress_robots_custom_modified_date":"","_seopress_robots_canonical":"","_seopress_social_fb_title":"","_seopress_social_fb_desc":"","_seopress_social_fb_img":"","_seopress_social_fb_img_attachment_id":0,"_seopress_social_fb_img_width":0,"_seopress_social_fb_img_height":0,"_seopress_social_twitter_title":"","_seopress_social_twitter_desc":"","_seopress_social_twitter_img":"","_seopress_social_twitter_img_attachment_id":0,"_seopress_social_twitter_img_width":0,"_seopress_social_twitter_img_height":0,"_seopress_redirections_value":"","_seopress_redirections_enabled":"","_seopress_redirections_enabled_regex":"","_seopress_redirections_logged_status":"both","_seopress_redirections_param":"","_seopress_redirections_type":301,"_seopress_analysis_target_kw":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[13],"tags":[18],"class_list":["post-1110","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-blog","tag-investing-in-the-common-good-especially-public-school"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/ashleybeanthornton.com\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1110","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/ashleybeanthornton.com\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/ashleybeanthornton.com\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ashleybeanthornton.com\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/17"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ashleybeanthornton.com\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1110"}],"version-history":[{"count":27,"href":"https:\/\/ashleybeanthornton.com\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1110\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2557,"href":"https:\/\/ashleybeanthornton.com\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1110\/revisions\/2557"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ashleybeanthornton.com\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/2461"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/ashleybeanthornton.com\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1110"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ashleybeanthornton.com\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1110"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ashleybeanthornton.com\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1110"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}